My flatmate has moved out and I now have the entire flat to myself. This means that I now have an empty bedroom to play with. What exactly to do with this is an interesting problem. A number of alternatives have emerged:
- My father has suggested supplementing my salary by going into the
fleshlove hotel trade, and renting the spare room out by the hour to young and amorous couples. This would incur investment on a new bed, and some manner of decoration, but would eventually pay for itself.
The question is how long the payback period would actually be. When I was in Shanghai in spring 2006, my utter lack of Mandarin meant I ended up checking in at the Motel 186 on Zhoujiazui Road instead of the one on Dalian Road. The Zhoujiazui Road Motel 186 was very much in the love hotel category. The biggest customer segment was university students who would take a room for an afternoon.
The problem is that university students pinch their pennies. So two or three couples would take a single room. If Bangalore customers are as bottom-of-pyramid as Shanghai customers, the internal rate of return would be far too low. Better to put the money into a fixed deposit instead of buying the bed. - More practically, I could just shift furniture so that one room becomes a bedroom and the other becomes a study. This sounds good, but it would make carrying the laptop to bed more difficult. Right now all I have to do is remove the USB cables for the printer, the hard disk, and the mouse, and pull it two feet to the bed. So this must be considered carefully.
- I could convert it into a storeroom, except that I don’t have anything to store.
- Religion. Old time religion. Construct an altar in the empty room in which I can sacrifice small furry animals and infants. I would have to give my maid a salary hike to deal with the extra mess, though.
- Or, I could go with the nuclear option. If I sell all my mutual funds, and take on an insane level of debt through personal loans, I could generate enough cash to fill the room with playpen balls.
1. You already have a precedent in form of ugly whore 🙂 You can rent it out for softer favours.
2. Easy, get a notebook dock. Just take it out of dock and take it to your bedroom.
Best is get playpen balls. Looks cool !
How about:
A. An altar to the Dread One;
and
B. A barbeque for the infants so sacrificed. After all, the Elder Gods love a good holocaust;
Alternately, you could use the room as a supply depot and staging point for your counterattack during World War Z. The Undead will rise and you’d better be ready for it.
Hmm
How about a studio for photography purposes? Which I could use when and if I do move to Bangalore?
IRR bad. NPV good.
And you can’t think of a shrine for Jagadguru.
Kali muthiduthu.