Massage Parlour Madness

In Hyderabad, Commissioner of Police AK Khan has discovered that brothels often advertise themselves as massage parlours because, well, advertising themselves as brothels is illegal. He has swung into action and it is now illegal in Hyderabad for masseurs to massage women, and masseuses to massage men.

I really want to know what happens when Commissioner Khan finds out about gay prostitutes. Will the ban then be extended to all massage parlours? That will be kind of awesome. Hyderabad has already had alcohol prohibition – then it will have massage prohibition as well. Every weekend, really rich Hyderabadis will fly to Singapore or Kochi for their massages. For the merely moderately rich ones, massage parlours will spring up as soon as the Greater Hyderabad Municipal Corporation limit ends. In fact, Y Rajeev Reddy will set up a Country Club with a massage parlour just outside municipal limits for this very purpose, and unleash ads showing him thumbs-upping next to a bevy of massage professionals.

Alternately, things could get all 1930s US-Prohibition style. News of massage parlours would circulate surreptitiously through word of mouth (or in these days, private facebook groups and twitter direct messages). People would go there in ones or twos, knock on an unmarked door, give a password and be let in for a massage. In case of a police raid, they will flee out the back door, leaving oil and towels in disarray.

Moreover, now that there is a beef ban in Karnataka, a massage ban in Hyderabad, and a virtual ban on decent booze in Tamland, the potential for a three-way smuggling operation is immense. Saileshbhai and Kalpeshbhai must be salivating.

5 Responses to Massage Parlour Madness

  1. Sumedha says:

    Do people who implement such idiotic bans actually have a logic behind them, or do they just want to look like they’re doing something to save the city and all? HOW can a ban on massages by the opposite gender have a significant effect on brothels?

    Nonsense!

  2. revathi says:

    Banning hardly ever helps! This reminds me of the time when France banned government servants from wearing anything that was even remotely connected to relegion- no bindis, no crosses on chains, no scarfs and so the list went on to include more and more items as days went by. Finally the education minister went so far as to ban beards in primary school. Sarkozy made a desperate attempt to calm everyone by saying that the bans are there but they wont actually be enforced. Honorable PM MMSingh intervened on time to stop the ban on turbans but didnt succeed except that a concession was made only for blue turbans

  3. vikas says:

    If banning doesn’t help, may be government should legalize it. Two advantages by doing this, one is by legalizing government gets much needed money in form of taxes and the other benefit is reduction in crime.

  4. jayan thomas mathew says:

    hey guys u are right

    rajeev reddy is a big mother fucker

    he earning money in dubai by selling a girls

    i know all this because i am one of the employe in this bussiness

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